31 December, 2015

A Happy Noo Year!

With the New Year approaching, this is the time of the year with everyone talking about New Year resolutions. We are talking about exercising regularly, eating healthy, reading frequently, traveling to new places, finishing that one creative project we started and so on. Well, here is something I'd like to share with you all on this year's resolutions.

While everyone is busy making the to-do-list and promising themselves with the change they desperately want to see, I would like to take on a different view on this subject. Focusing our energies and goals on what NOT to do this coming year can really help in our well-being and definitely have a positive and fulfilling effect on our efficiency. As bestselling author Curtis Sittenfeld has said, “Politely saying no can free up astonishing amounts of time.” Well, as always, it is easier said than done.


I call myself a dreamer, I like imagining my future, making a list of all the things I like to see myself doing and then taking a step forward to complete this bright picture I have painted for myself. And one of the biggest hurdles I face in achieving these goals is the discomfort/ the hesitance/ the incapacity to say "NO". Of course, in no way, I want to blame my failures on one particular thing. But, I do believe that the art of saying no plays a great role in accomplishing anything.


One can be hard-working, have clearly established goals, priorities set right, but without understanding the importance of saying "NO", the person will always end up having a busy life instead of a disciplined life. So, this New Year's, let's focus on making a "Stop Doing" list in contrast to a "To Do" list. 


It is extremely difficult to say no and be happy about it. I am going to walk you through some everyday happenings and how saying no to a friend can be an extremely difficult and even uncomfortable. Someone is definitely going to be hurt. I am always concerned about what will the other person feel if I say no to something. Here's what can help us in this coming year:


1) Do not accumulate thoughts, do not wait up;

One of the great things I force myself to do is not build resentment. When you do not like really asked about the same things repeatedly by a friend, spouse; do not let these feelings build up in your mind. Try to clear them up when you're calm and not fed up. This can save you from bottling up all those feelings that are eventually going to explode.

2) Do not feel guilty about saying no;

You just cannot say yes all the time. And we all agree that some requests are just too frequent, immoderate and sometimes plain inappropriate. Well, your friend might think it is reasonable to ask for some favor, assume things about you, or make downright decisions for you, but as a matter of fact, you may feel otherwise. True friends have to be open to a reasonable no and sensitive to each other's feelings.

3) If they can't accept no as an answer, it is THEIR problem and NOT yours;

Some people can be just too demanding and will take you for granted. This will mostly happen if someone is used to hearing yes from you all the time, this person can have a very hard time accepting your no. You should be really firm about your decision in this situation.

4) If you are unable to say no, find out why;

I feel this is really important, as some people including myself, just do not know how to say No. You might be thinking about the other person's feelings, doubting your own priorities, and sometimes misjudging the situation. It is really important to ask yourself "If it is all worth it?" and stick to the answer.

5) Hold your ground;

This is by far the most difficult task; you might be manipulated, blackmailed emotionally, flattered, coaxed into saying a yes.  Always, look at the long term and short term effects of your decision. And, never give explanations, most of the times it won't work in your favor. Do try to convey your "no" politely with conviction, but do accompany it with a list of excuses/ justifications.


"Say no to everything, so you can say yes to the one thing.” - Richie Norton
And on this note, I wish you all a very Happy New Year. 

May this new year bring out the best in you, and give you the nerve to say "NO".



28 August, 2014

Life at 22...oops 23!

It had been a lazy weekend, ogling at my computer screen, looking straight ahead at nothing and that's when a train of thoughts ran through my mind. Out of the zillion thoughts that sprung up in my mind, I was baffled wondering which thought to entertain. For a moment, everything seemed stagnant, and as I zeroed down to what's really happening, I heard a few voices in my head.

Sometimes, I feel the voices fight amongst themselves. Today, they seemed to have united to examine me.

Everyday has something new waiting for us. We have plans and life has its plans. Everyone lives in their own time zone. A few people tend to be present hedonists, while most of us are future-oriented.
Read The Beginning! to get a hang of time-zone perspectives.

Life at 23 gives us a whole new set of questions as well as theories. The first thing to figure out is our own time perspective. We evolve with time, so does our time zone. In today's world we transform from the happy little breast sucking babies to world class future planners.

It questions us about our very own self. Is life the way we imagined it to be? As I happen to mention in The Beginning, we are keen to grow up as kids and we long to find the kid within ourselves as we grow up. The most striking difference between a child and an adult is Perspective. It so intriguing that one simple thing can be seen in two completely different ways. But we fail to appreciate the difference.

I always feel it is very important for that little kid inside us to be alive. It is purely our responsibility to not let that one thing die within us.

The voice that could unite to tell me this message.. is not any ordinary thought that just occurred. It is something very deep. It is the scarring experience that made me realize it is so important for that kid to never die.






30 September, 2011

LIFE


Time goes by and memories remain..
Eccentricity manifests as the future ensues..
the world abides us to slavery and we urge for emancipation..
we know it all, the Games of our mind.
but who will tell this tender heart, it is time.
What we want in LIFE? becomes the question of anxiety.
We forget the present and crave for that hidden reality.
Who did know? What one really wants, it already has!
Its simply the matter of perception..


05 May, 2011

The Beginning

Well in the midst of my exams, I had this thought, years back too I gave exams, so did everyone else. But there’s a big difference in what was and what is. I think I loved the subjects, the teachers or maybe was always somehow motivated by parents, elders. Today giving my engineering exams, the scenario has changed. Not that I didn’t want to take up engineering or anything of that sort, but something really has changed. We’ve grown up.

         Just remember the times when we were kids, how super enthusiastic and eager we used to be just to get older. Our age increased in fractions. I’m 6 and ½. I’m going to be fourteen. How much fun it seemed like growing up.
           
 But today I don’t feel the same. Turning 18 is fun. Actually its cool. Turning 21 is great. As exclaimed by people, yet to know what its like.
But later time just goes. And I just don’t like getting old.

           I just loved my childhood. No reasons.
Actually honestly, my school friends will agree to this fact, about how shy, reserved, introvert was I, then! Today, I can frame it like.. exactly contrary to what I’m today.
           But today when I remember my childhood, I see it as how nice it was to have a few friends, everyone pulling your cheeks, being afraid of that uncle next door and when you enjoyed all the festivals (in true sense) and when it was so much just to assist your bro in his work and get yelled upon at the same time for it.
How nice were the summer vacations, the days I went swimming (I LOVE swimming), the times I use to jump and dance in front of the cooler and play games with mom.


I loved my daily schedule then. Get up, do home work, write tables just before the auto comes (infact get it written from my bro {:P} 5 mins before my auto-wale-uncle came shouting ‘Pallavi’), go to school, recess, games, come home in the evening, watch the awesomest cartoons (seriously read the CARTOONS), play, have dinner and sleeeep!
That was Life!

You lived in the moment then. Today you think you have grown up, you think you have responsibilities. Today you think about your future. And there you’ve it, simply lost it.
But but but, growing up is something we can’t avoid. We could make it fun too. But the indispensable part of it is remaining young at heart. 18 till I die… ;-) B)

Cartoons

Wow…. the word is wow.. One of things I miss the most about my childhood is the awesome cartoons I used to watch as a kid.
          Cartoons as well as the tele-series.

The list is eternal..
It starts from alladin, mickey mouse, Donald duck, uncle scrooge, Duck tales, The Bugs Bunny show, Scoooby Doooooby Doo, DENNIS The Menace, tom and jerry, The Flintstones, Jetsons (remember..) The Adam’s (weirdest) family, Richie Rich, SpiderMan, NINJA turtles, Swat Kats, Captain Planet, Batman, Dexter’s Laboratory, Power Puff Girls (btw I’m ButterCup), Fantastic Four, Pokemon….

And its wow…….<howl>
         
          And how can I forget Small Wonder….the lovely little robot of the 80s. Awe-inspiring, short of any exemplary words. I loved it then and I love it more today..

          I really pity today's generation. They have nothing of it all. I was so lucky! Very happy.
          
PERFECT
          And guys, feel free to add superb cartoons in case I have missed any, they were splendid and are eternal..          

26 March, 2011

Small is big!



They say in the course of time, People change, we evolve, life goes on.. but what remains with us is the Memories. Feeling this strong rush of nostalgia as i think of mychildhood...
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Daddy's girl

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12 March, 2011

If anything has to go wrong, it WILL !!

Well, today was quite a day, starting from 11th hour preparation for the presentation to whole day of project work; i am left exhausted, a bit lost, more or less in some trance.
          A bit unusual daydream, I thought about a lot of events that have affected me lately, from the emotional trauma to the practical problems. I have tortured my brain like anything.
          Today, somehow I could associate atleast one Murphy’s law with each of the thing pestering me. Murphy’s laws are really intriguing. Seriously. And this blog is about these amazing laws we live with.

About its origin: they say if anything has to go wrong, IT WILL. How true, I say! This is what has been happening with me, from quite a time.
I find this correlation quite amazing. Have a look.

Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse. Tried and tested. That’s quite a normal reflex applied to certain situations. But the lesson is things don’t heal with time.

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something. Of course, nothing is meant to be perfect and without friction. When you think, things are at their best, you are entirely, completely, thoroughly MISTAKEN. Just keep polling your behaiviour, nothing can ever be smooth sailing.

He who angers you controls you, therefore you have no control over your anger. Hmm, people who know me know me as the most patient, calm, composed, soft person. I try my best to not lose my temper ever. But when I do, its time one could wish death better, but sadly the one who suffers immensely is me. Lesson- just don’t lose your temper. FORGET and FORGIVE. There are superbly awesome things waiting for you to invest your time and brain in!
         
          Talking about all this, the most interesting part comes is the Murphy’s technology laws. Our Sir talks all the time about it. Well very simple ones go like this, if your project examination is today, the project is likely not going to work like it did the whole week before.
You just can’t get enough of these.

Anyways, lets conclude this with the philosophy I believe, I have realized it’s all a mind game. I am so proud of this ingenious brain, and we all are trapped in its trivial moves. Sometimes its better to just stop torturing it, and of course I don’t want to die of alzheimer’s LOL (they say risk factors include: history of head trauma and female gender) :-D.

Be HAPPY. KEEP Learning.

And yeah, don’t forget A knowledge of Murphy's Law is of no help in any situation. he ha ha..

28 October, 2010

Its PL time

Hey friends,
                  Its PL time, all engineers know the "essence" of this so called preparation leave but you all will agree its kind of vacations for us. And for all my Pune University mates, its not just a vacation, its the time called LIFE.
                  Well this is my first blog and yes PL is the best time to come up with it. Actually PL is the time, when you can actually live your dreams. The whole semester sucks out your life and yes those creepy bunch of lectures you attend with teachers who are basically "Dementors", feed off your happiness and leave you in despair! But yeah you kinda enjoy it, and try to be optimistic about them, though just to pacify a bit of ego!

             Well, with me the PL story comes like this. I make all the plans of what and how abouts of everything i wished to do the sem, but couldn't. The planning is tremendous, nothing less to the big wedding planning, i say! I wish to leave no stone unturned, i have all my schedules, all activities listed down. Everything seems just perfect. But something has to be their with the PLs.

The PLs arrive. I have everything finalized, all set. The only thing remaining is Execution. I'm put to test, and yes the results are just wonderful. Here it goes- Plans include morning jog, skating, a bit of reading ( have got all sorts of novels i wish to read) of course some time to study (its preparation leave ya ;p) then household chores, evening walk, painting, and yes Sleeping. But what actually happens is i wake up and i sleep. And the cycle just goes on. I wonder if its a vicious circle.

I have become so lethargic, so lazy , nearly allergic to activities. I seriously think there is some connection of this PL and universe. They conspire all this. I'm so real active all my semester days, infact hyper active and PL comes as a wonderful desire- one with rest, tranquility, self introspection time and bullshit happens and all just goes futile.
      But surely PL has something very mysterious about it. It opens up to thee only when thee surrender to it !